Grievances

After refusing to repost a bulletin I read earlier, I'm spending the next few minutes planning ways to improve my luck, which is apparently going to be shitty for the next 15 years. It makes you wonder what life was like before all these ridiculous forwards were introduced to ruin the luck of the human race for the next decade plus.
It's absurd! I know I stepped on a few cracks, and my mothers back never broke. I've broken mirrors, opened umbrellas indoors, but....not even these things put a bad joo-joo on you for FIFTEEN years.

Hell, gum only stays in your system for 7. (lol)

It's like when you get one of those wank-ass text messages telling you how great of a person you are, and how thankful so-and-so is to have you in their life. But, you secretly know that they just forwarded it to like 3534151 people, twelve of which were all in the room with you when you got it (and so did they cuz you all collectively said "ugh..i hate forwards) leading you to think "god...how special can I be, I just heard *insert name* get the same text, and I know he hates that bitch".
People. Listen. Your luck isn't gonna change if you don't pass that shit on. It might even improve. I mean, at least I won't hate you more. Your family members aren't gonna die cuz you didn't post it. And, contrary to what it says...you probably will have sex again at some point. Unless you look like Jon Lovitz. (or...infact ARE Jon Lovitz. I don't care what kinda residuals "A League of their Own" gives him...there can't be many people fucking him willingly)

I don't need any text message with an embedded picture of a heart and some roses with it, to confirm my friendships.
If you find yourself sitting there thinking "hmm...I wonder if Nicklous knows how much I love him"...A simple "Hey Nick...Just wanted to text you and let you know that I fucking love you" will suffice. I'll prolly text back with "awe...I fucking love you too". Unless I don't, which...I might be wondering why you're texting me that you love me, if I don't love you back in the first place. But, even still I'd prolly text you back with an "awe..me too! so whats up" (avoiding saying I love you, if you don't infact love someone, is perfectly acceptable. Trust me, I do it all the time at work) lol

Another grievance I have is people that act like assholes, then act like they know they were an asshole. I like my assholes to be dirty, shady assholes. I want you to pretend you never did anything.
So, Craig. It's safe to order from me at the bar. You don't have to lurk around B and pretend you aren't thirsty. We both know you're a raging alcoholic. Let's not pretend you came there, seen me and suddenly want to pass it off as not bein in the mood to drink. I make drinks for alot of people I don't like. Just as I'm sure everyone you make a pizza for isn't on your Christmas card list. So, Fear not. As much as I'd like to spit in your drink (or...you know..worse) I'm not like that. (I actually wouldn't come to you for a drink either...but...you know..this is about me. Not you. Douchebag)

While we're on grievances...I've got a few more. People that claim to be your "best friend" or "one of your best friends" yet...lie to you over the dumbest shit. I don't need to know everything you do, but if you are gonna tell me what you did...TELL ME WHAT YOU DID, not some fabricated version of what you did. Once it's a lie..it's not what you did....It becomes what you DIDNT do.

I'm also not fond of people who start talking to someone, fall head over heels, then gets fucked over, then forgives, then gets fucked over again, then forgives, then lied to and fucked over 37 times in a row, then...comes bitching and moaning to their friend (who is ALWAYS there for them) then...because they fall for the same old routine, and said friend wants nothing to do with the lying sonodacunt.....basically treats the friend like they've done something wrong, and makes them feel like a complete outsider.

I don't like people that don't return phone calls.
I don't like people that pretend other peoples' feelings aren't important. I mean, I'm a dickhead...and I'm still aware that other people matter. It's not always just about me.

I'm also very upset with MTV. Myself being an avid fan of DVR, I record almost everything that I view on television. I couldn't even tell you the last thing I watched live. (it was LOST last night..I couldn't wait) I don't know what's wrong with MTV, maybe it's that fuckin MTV News bullshit they do, that throws off all the programming by 3 minutes, or what...but I'm sick and fucking tired of missing the end of the fucking Real World:Brooklyn. You'd think some genuis would figure out a way to make DVR record the whole god damned program, not just the time the program is scheduled for. It's more than just MTV, too.

The Academy Awards. Every year, they go way over. The year Reese Witherspoon won Best Actress,...They announce her name. She walks up. Starts crying. And....says... Nothing. Show over. All I get is "delete program" or "do not delete program". I still dunno what she said.

The year Carrie Underwood won American Idol. There she is. (Ryan Seacrest) And, theres Carrie Underwood and Bo Bice. Holding hands. And the winner is... "delete program" "do not delete program". I had to look it up online, after my roomate and I stood there...jaws dropped momentarily cause we couldn't believe we waited all season for that moment..and then...didn't get it.

And, I won't even mention the fact that CBS' schedule on Sundays is ALWAYS fucked up during football season. Every sunday, I get half of 60 minutes, and the first half of the Amazing Race. And, lets face it...the second half is WAY better than the first half.

Another debacle I'm having is idiots in my apartment building. Every weekend some random asshole has dumped beer all over in one of the elevators, or left trash all over one of the elevators. Cat Litter, all over one of the elevators. Food, all over the elevators. Silly string, all over the elevators. I wanna write a note like "hey...assholes. Im not sure how you prefer the place YOU fucking live in, to look...but I prefer it to not look like I'm twelve years old and sleep in a fucking twin size bed shaped like a racecar. So, if you could please try not to throw your shit allllll over the place, and keep it confined to your own apartment, that'd be great. I kinda like not having cockroaches. But, I can't speak for everyone here. Obviously." Like, do you not have respect for yourself? Who the fuck wants to live in a place like that?

What about people that come out to the bar, and pay with nickles and dimes. Or, give me two dimes and a nickle and ask for a solid quarter. Or, pay with nickles and dimes, and apologize for it. then 20 minutes later pay with a 20 dollar bill. I gotta tell people ahead of time "we don't take any kind of change except quarters" cause these bitches are tryin to pay outta their fuckin piggy banks. If you ain't got money, don't go out. It's simple. The bar is not the fucking bank. lol.

I guess that's all for now. On a completely unrelated note... I wasn't sure how I was going to feel exactly once our newly elected president took office. I don't at all consider myself political. However after listening to him speak, (and getting teary eyed) I find myself suddenly interested. Suddenly excited. I don't know if Barrack Obama will be a successful president. I know he's oft compared to John F. Kennedy. I don't know what great, or lackluster things he will accomplish. But, I do know that he holds a special ability to speak directly to the hearts of people. I've experienced a sense of excitement when he talks. He offers me inspiration. And, that is something to be spoken for. I don't know anything about his policies, or what he promises to do, or whether he can achieve anything more than idle promises... But I do know that he has the ability to inspire a generation. He has the power to invoke change, and offer hope. And, that goes alot further than one might choose to believe. A few months ago, I didn't really care who became president. I can honestly say that I'm very glad that this person was elected. I think there's a very strong possibility that he will go down as one of the best political faces to ever helm the United States of America. (and..if I'm wrong...who the fuck cares..I said I know nothing about politics.) lol.

As long as he gets the DVR thing fixed. I'm good.